you're right. we both haven't been completely open with each other. of course, we don't talk much. good for you, happy to know you're fixing bad ends. it's all good rofl. course i know our communication is horrible, i'm the cause of it 99% of the time. trust me. it ain't love. LMAO. rude, but truth hurts. i only say that cause this is faaaaaar from this thing you call "love", we're in a book but in different pages, different chapters. not even. maybe i'm book 1 and you're a sequel . that's how far i feel. either that, or i've been reading too much. no. you don't need things to stop the way you are, are you dumb? don't change yourself for anybody if they don't deserve it, i swear i taught you better. you've hurt me too much? how ironic. ..you know what else makes me feel .. LOL-ish? you have to think about it to know you want to be with me. it's jokes. i don't believe in changing for another person. i don't believe in falling in love. i don't believe in a good relationship anymore. it's not about you, but my experiences, my knowledge, what i've been through. honestly.. lately, you've been doing the craziest things to get on my nerves, and you don't even notice. that's te funny thing. thing with #1. i'm glad you guys are good. it's whaaaatever. notice. you trust her. you can run to her. she's there for you. she understands you. am i any of that? you need her. i'm not even saying anything about it because it's the same for me. i got someone, you got someone. funny how they're exes, but whatever's smooth =) no worries. i completely understand she was your first for everything. it's not even her that bothers me, but you. rofl how cruel. but straight up is always best. i've been feeling unappreciated, alone, disrespected, used. waaaait a second. that's exactly how i feel with my family. awesome. so i admit that makes me want to close you off, more of bullshit doesn't help me. i don't know. all i know is i don't give a fuck. i've been thinking about school. how i was, how i was so happy, i was on my own grind, i did my things, independent. i want it back. you apparently know you want to be with me, do i? lost for words. lmao. self control has never been a thing for you, loving, caring, keeping something for long has never been a thing for me. look at all of this in a wide range of view. have you yet? rofl, we're looking for completely different things. you want a committed, down to earth, real true relationship. i don't. you want you to be my everything. i don't. i want to be single. you don't. you like me more than i like you, who can argue with that? you claim you're willing to put all of you, i can barely come up with half. can you see the difference? is it worth any of you if i don't put up my end? you're tellin me you don't know how you feel and a minute later you think you want to be with me. i find it intriguing, haha. sometimes this feels real to me, other times i have to think about it. weigh options. imagine if we were together. awesome, right? imagine we were together arguing. LMAOLMAO breakups. endlessly. truthfully that's how i see that path. i've stopped being mad with you if you do something stupid, talk to other g's, those kinda things. what does that mean?